Relationships Pt. 2

What is love anyway? Does anybody love anybody anyway. Oh Howard Jones. Your lyrics... so insightful.

Love is... a best friend. Someone you can see yourself growing old with and never getting sick of. Okay, you might get sick of dirty laundry on the floor. You might get sick of dishes stacked in the kitchen. What is that stuff anyway? Every day life that just needs a little kindness and organization. You don't love someone because they are clean. You don't love someone because they have it together in the financial department. You love someone because you like to be with them. To stay up all night and talk or play games. Love is seeing that someone has flaws, and loving them beyond the flaws. Love is allowing someone see YOUR flaws and trusting that they will love you in spite of them.

Love is building a solid friendship. If you are with someone right now... I'm hoping your relationship started out as friendship. Laughter, fun, talking about anything and everything. Waking up with them as your first thought in the morning and going to sleep with them on your mind at night.

Let's really look at friendship. Friendship is when you desire what is best for the other person. It shares mutual compassion and understanding. Friendship holds honesty high on it's list of values. Friendship involves mutual trust without the fear of being judged. It is a relationship with equal give and take.

C.S Lewis in "The Four Loves" wrote - "To the Ancients, Friendship seemed the happiest and most fully human of all loves; the crown of life and the school of virtue."

Is your relationship built on solid friendship? A friendship that can weather all storms in life? Are you judging your partner on what he or she does for you? What if you tweak your way of looking at your relationship and treat your partner as your best friend? What if you start to think about what you can do for your partner, rather than what they can do for you?

Thanks for reading! ~ Dawn

Relationships Part 1

As promised, I'm back again with another post on a topic that is so close to my heart - relationships. The things I have to say are not new concepts. You'll find no instant fix or magic potion here. Just some ideas that are really back to basics. It seems to me that the first thing I should write about is "What is Love?" I'll branch out from there.

Looking up "love" on dictionary.com and scanning through the definitions, the one that popped out at me was under noun: "the affectionate concern for the well-being of others."

Going further, I looked up the word Love on wikipedia.org to see what had been posted there. "In philosophical context, love is a virtue representing all of human kindness, compassion and affection."

On a higher authority, the Bible says in 1 Corinthians 13 (The Message version)
"Love never gives up.
Love cares more for others than for self.
Love doesn't want what it doesn't have.
Love doesn't strut,
Doesn't have a swelled head,
Doesn't force itself on others,
Isn't always "me first,"
Doesn't fly off the handle,
Doesn't keep score of the sins of others,
Doesn't revel when others grovel,
Takes pleasure in the flowering of truth,
Puts up with anything,
Trusts God always,
Always looks for the best,
Never looks back,
But keeps going to the end.
Love never dies."

There are other definitions out there of "love"... but this love is what our relationships should be based on. Whether your relationship is between you and a friend, a spouse, a child, a partner.... Love is, simply put, an action. I've learned this over the years, sometimes from tough lessons. I think I'll let the definitions sink in a bit and hope you'll read them over more than once.

More tomorrow! Thanks for reading! ~ Dawnee

I haven't spent time blogging lately for a few reasons. First of all, I have been spending my time with grand kids and learning to paint. So far, I've decided that my talent in watercolour painting is lacking and I long to sit and just draw. I don't know why I haven't just gone back to drawing all the time instead of pushing myself to have a talent that just isn't there.
The main reason I haven't blogged lately is because I've had one thing on my heart and to write about it may cause some of my readers to think that I have them in mind while writing. Truly, the topic is something that has been on my heart for years. Especially with my kids growing into adulthood. Relationships. That is the topic I want to focus on for a bit. I'll still throw in a bit of artwork, failure or success... but my heart longs to heal and encourage others in their relationships. More directly, marriages and significant others.
I hope that as I write about this excitement in my heart to help strengthen others will be something that you are willing to come back and read. Especially each and every one of my kids. Because they have survived the breakdown of my marriage to their father and the subsequent issues that arise because of that breakdown... my desire is to help keep each one of them as well as my friends and family from going through the same thing.
Before I get down to it, I want to state that my writing will have no bashing of my ex husband. We share equal responsibility in our breakup. He is someone I will love and be close to for the rest of our lives. I'm extremely lucky that we have worked through our issues and have remained, even become better friends than we ever were.
My next blog will be written and added tomorrow. I have a few things to touch on and I don't want to put everything into one blog. Blogs are supposed to be quick and easy to read. I shan't allow my passion overtake too much of your time in one sitting, I promise. But please... if you have a heart to listen, and would like to respond to the blog with your own experiences, I'd love to share in a give and take manner. For now.... blessings and thanks for reading! ~ Dawnee

Learning

After all my years of being a part of an artistically talented family, I've finally picked up the pencil and have chosen to take lessons on the internet. There are so many amazing artists in the world, it just blows my mind. I've no hope of ever achieving the true depth of an artist who can turn a canvas into a work of art with hundreds or thousands of dollars, I know this. However... I am truly enjoying learning and practicing. I've always enjoyed Photoshop and Paint Shop Pro... even tackled a couple of pieces on my own that I'm pretty proud of for a beginner. However, I find that sitting and working with actual paper and graphite is so satisfying, that I am constantly drawn back to that medium.

Collie purchased an awesome series on watercolour painting, and that is my next step in the arts. We've really enjoyed listening and watching the gentleman who has taken the time to share his talent and teaching. In fact, I've joined a community of artists who will not accept photography or digital art at all.... just graphite, charcoal, acrylic, oils and watercolour pieces of art can be found in the gallery. It's pretty exclusive compared to digitalblashpemy.com who opens it's galleries to whatever you want to share. I'll continue with that site as well because I've learned so much there.

My self appointed lessons this week have been perspective drawing. The concept is clear and right on.... but when I use the the horizon and the focal points.... I don't feel as if I am creating. I feel like I'm sitting at a CAD lesson. So.... I'm absorbing the concepts, but loosely. I've promised myself that I will keep everything I draw for now in hopes that over time I will see growth and maturity in my creations.

Mom is an accomplished artist with paint mediums. When I was growing up, our living room wall displayed all of mom's oil paintings. To us kids, it was just normal. I guess I assumed that other parents must have the same types of hobbies, and didn't give a second thought to the two partially naked women hanging proudly on our wall. One was of a lovely Hawaiian woman holding a multicolored towel around her waist. Her very prominent and perky dark breasts were just... breasts in my eyes. I learned different when my teenage male friends would walk into my house.... mouths dropping open, tongues lolling with drool dribbling down their chins. I promised myself I'd never draw breasts, that I would stick with nature/landscape pictures. But I must admit that last week I drew a set of breasts. They turned out quite nicely. Now if I just had mom's knack of painting the rest of the body... I wouldn't have a page with disembodied breasts floating on it.

One of these days.... I will own a violin. In fact, if anyone knows of someone who has a violin collecting dust who would be willing to let it go for a nice low price, or in trade, please let me know. My next venture will be violin lessons online.

I love that about the availability we have now, to reach out and learn whatever we want. Horticulture is another area I'll be pursuing. Anyway.... I'm excited about the work I am doing... and I shall be posting items to chronicle my growth. Or stagnancy for that matter. :)

So much to say... I have two topics floating around in my head that I have been putting off the last week.... it all is cleared up right now... so I shall start to focus more on those things that truly draw me in. Pun intended.

Besides... I have creative children, and they are a lot of my schoolwork. How I would love to create a piece of art for each of them to proudly display in their homes!

Whetder you are in to music, crafts, arts, cooking.... whatever the hobby may be.... google.com is your friend.

Thanks for reading! ~ Dawnee

thanks for reading! ~ Dawnee

When Your Child Bleeds Too Much

Before Rachel reads the title of this post and says "Mommy! Take it away!" I want to let you fine folks know that I'll not be grossing you out and going into really personal details.

Our family, the womenfolk anyway, don't seem to like to be held to the constraints of time and science. When we began to blossom into women, the shut off switch seemed to be out of order. Most girls are lucky... they begin to menstruate close to the same date every month, and they are free from that inconvenience within a few days to a week. Life goes on. Not for the Groves girls. When the bleeding starts.... it hates to stop. So much so that Rachel has had 2 blood transfusions to replace what her body had shed over months of nonstop menstrual cycle.

In an adult female a hemoglobin count should be 12-16 gm/dl (grams per deciliter, a deciliter being 100 mililiters.) This last week we discovered that Rachel's was at 7 gm/dl. Hence, another transfusion.

There are a lot of things that go through a young woman's head when she is getting a blood transfusion.... "Who did the blood belong to?" "Will I feel differently with someone else's blood in me?" "Will my body accept the blood?"

Rachel was a bit distraught that she had to go through the procedure again after having had a transfusion a few years ago. But, she hung in there, dealt with the needles and the 5 hours of dripping, swap of bags, flushing, temperature taking, blood pressure cuff squeezing and oxygen levels being checked. She did a fabulous job. Hopefully that will be the last time she ever has to go through something like that ever again.

My purpose in writing this is twofold.... first, just to let friends and family know that she made it through just fine, and they are doing what they can to keep her from having to go through it again. Secondly.... if you have a young lady in your life that has started to look pale... seems to be out of breath or feels dizzy when she stands up.... don't be afraid to ask her how her period is going. Our doctor told us that if a normal person lost that much blood in one day, they would be unconscious. The fact that the blood loss is gradual doesn't take away from the danger.... however, the young woman may not even realize that her body is in danger. She may feel "just fine." That is because her body has slowly gotten used to living without the full amount of blood pumping through her heart and veins. Take the time to communicate with your kids/cousins/nieces/sisters.... we girls need to watch out for each other.

Thanks for reading! ~ Dawn

When We Can't Sleep

I've settled back into my habits of insomnia of old... that time of night when the grankids, husband and daughter are all tucked into their beds and I lie awake at night relishing the quiet. My first husband hated that I loved to stay up late to read, write, craft or play a game in the calm silence of the night. Now my husband tells me to "try to get some sleep" but never nags at me for my nighttime forays. I love the gentle snores coming from the kids room... I love that I can move throughout the house without stumbling in to anyone and I love that when I finally DO fall asleep... I wake up to laughter and activity. It's a real home here now with Laura and the kids living with us. During my sleep failure, I have found that I love to draw... learn to draw and paint... maybe watch an old show on netflix. And... I think about my kids. I don't just think about them, I lift them up in prayer.

Tonite I picked up on old friend and favorite - Stephen King's INSOMNIA. It's been a few years since I have read that amazing book and I'm ready to go through Ralph's wretched loss of his wife who will be taken from him in the form of a brain tumor as he sits awake, listening to her lifewatch tick tick ticking away. Ralph will be slipping off the deep end soon even before his beloved Carolyn succumbs to her cancer. Neighbors will begin to act differently. People he has trusted will mumble the words "The Crimson King" and he will begin to feel as if reality is a slippery slope that he may not be able to manage. As for me.... I shall use my insomnia to read through Ralph's adventures. Even though this book starts with death it is really about the wacko crazy stuff that goes on in our world that we don't even glimpse..... and Ralph's ability to move forward and take part in life even after the love of his is gone and in the midst of all this craziness.

Because I AM sleepy, I can feel my mind wandering down that slippery slope, if you see me sliding by and notice a very short doctor with some very big scissors.... keep him away from me. I'm not ready for my lifeline to be cut yet. ~ Thanks for reading! ~ Dawn

Meet Miss Precious

I don't have time to blog right now, but I had to share this picture! Our granddaughter Ramona decided to suck all the beauty of the world into herself. It's really not fair to the rest of the kids out there.